"Suck it up, get over it, this isn’t about you" - Your Postpartum Stories

Sharing your postpartum voice - September 2024

Gentle reminder that we have our Community Connection Circle this evening at 7pm London time - it is online, via Zoom and you can find all the information & the Zoom link below ✨ come along and take 90 minutes just for yourself ❤️

Thank you for joining me in this space where we come together to share and honour the powerful stories of postpartum experiences. I’m Sophie, and I work closely with Zoe - the founder and director of Postpartum Matters CIC - and together we’re passionate advocates for women’s health and well-being. In this monthly segment, I’m privileged to share the voices of women who have opened up about their journeys— their stories are filled with pain, resilience, and strength.

You can read all of the previous posts, and catch up on the entire series here:

Since starting this series, I've been moved by the hundreds of narratives we've received, each one shining a light on the often overlooked realities of postpartum care. Today, I’m sharing some of these stories with you. They’re not just about motherhood but about the broader experience of womanhood, encompassing the silent struggles and remarkable courage that often accompany it.

If you have your own story to share, I warmly invite you to contribute. You can use this Google form to share as much or as little as you feel comfortable with.

As you read, please take care of yourself. Some of these experiences are intense, but it’s by acknowledging them that we can start pushing for the changes that are so urgently needed in postpartum care.

If you find value in these posts and the work we’re doing, we’d be deeply grateful for your support. Your contributions help keep this newsletter going and also fund the free, daily support we provide through The Women’s Health Hub. Consider becoming a paid subscriber here or making a one-off contribution here. Every bit of support helps us continue this important work.

Let’s explore these stories together…

“I had high blood pressure up until nearly 6 months after birth. I had to fight to see anyone after coming out of hospital after a week and not one doctor saw me while we were in. My mental health was passed on as ‘normal’ until I told them I couldn’t leave the house and was thinking about taking my own life. My midwife and HV were amazing and there was only so far they could go to get me help. It was other parties that didn’t want to”

“My now three year old daughter was delivered by forceps, I had an episiotomy and tore. Five days in the stitches became infected and midwives didn't pick up on it. When I became ill at eight days midwives refused to see me and sent me to the GP, who sent me to hospital, who sent me back to midwives. Eventually, after a week I was seen, by which point a nurse described the wound was 'about to pop'.

Postnatal physio said I had 3c/4 tearing, they also said the infection likely made the damage worse. Because of this I was told any further births should be by c section.

I delivered a healthy boy three weeks ago. My C section scar became infected on day nine. Again, midwives refused to see me, and I had to fight to be seen by my GP. I'm now on day seven of a course of antibiotics and fearful of the damage done.

I understand our NHS and midwives are up against it, but postpartum care needs to be longer and more thorough.

The damage done through my first birth caused more appointments and will require my having physio for life, which uses NHS resources. Had I been treated sooner, this possibly could have been avoided-thus saving NHS resources and me a great deal of pain and distress.”

“Pelvic physiotherapy for all women after childbirth, access to midwifery/specialised postpartum care (during 10 day midwife period and after as well). E.g. my c section scar was infected and I was just told to call GP.”

“I had an episiotomy that burst open. I was given conflicting advice - the GP told me one thing, the midwife told me another. But the ultimate feeling was: suck it up, get over it, this isn’t about you. It took me eight weeks to heal, I could barely walk. I cried the entire time and barely enjoyed my newborn. I felt like I was treat like an animal. Mothers need as much love, care and respect as the babies they birthed.”

“I have had no health visitor contact apart from a phone call at 8 weeks. Questions asked were all yes/no answers. I also don't have access to an individual health visitor- have to call a helpline. Also no breastfeeding support. New mums need actual, face to face support for at least 3 months if not longer. Services need more money and resources to do so”

“Improvement this time round compared to my first as my perineum was checked at 6 week GP appt. But I still hadn't fully healed.”

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“Retained membranes - I felt I wasn’t taken seriously when passing large pieces of membrane. A referral for ultrasound was not made until after my 3rd trip to triage. I felt that I was not treated as a priority because my baby was already born.”

Thank you for taking the time to engage with these stories today. Each one is a reminder of the gaps in postpartum care and the urgent need for better support systems. These aren’t just stories—they’re a call to action for all of us.

If you or someone you know is struggling postnatally, I encourage you to seek out support. The Women’s Health Hub offers a range of free resources and events to help guide you through this time. You can check out our timetable of events here. Even if the solution isn’t straightforward, we’re here to provide a safe space for you.

There are also other incredible organisations like Make Birth Better, The Birth Trauma Association, and Know Your Floors that offer crucial support. Additionally, you can make your voice heard by contacting your local MP to advocate for better postpartum care. Find out how to reach your MP here.

If these stories resonated with you, please consider sharing this post by ‘restacking’ it, or forwarding it to others who might benefit from or contribute to the conversation. Together, we can raise awareness and push for the changes that are so needed.

Your support, whether through subscribing, sharing, or simply reading, means the world to us. Thank you for being part of this journey.

Until next time,